When I was asked if I would be willing to write a book on death and dying, I enthusiastically accepted the challenge. When I actually sat down and began to wonder what I had got myself into strangers who are going to read this book, how much can I share from this experience witho y to it became a different matter. Where do i begin? what do i include? How much can I sa patients? How many things are communicated nonverbally and have to be felt, experienced, seen and can hardly be translated into words? I have worked with dying patients for the past two and a half years and this book will tell about the beginning of this experiment, which turned out to be a meaningful and instructive experience for all participants. It is not meant to be a textbook on how to manage dying patients, nor is it intended as a complete study of the psychology of the dying. It is simply an account of a new and challenging opportunity to refocus on the patient as a human being, to include him in dialogues, to learn from him the strengths and weaknesses of our hospital management of the patient. We have asked him to be our teacher so that we may learn more about the final stages of life with all its anxieties, fears, and hopes. I am simply telling the stories of my patients who shared their agonies, their expectations, and their frustrations with us. It is hoped that it will encourage others not to shy away from the"hopelessly"sick but to get closer to them, as they can help them much during their final hours. The few who can do this will also discover that it can be a mutually gratifying experience they will learn much about the functioning of the human mind, the unique human aspects of our existence,and will emerge from the experience enriched and perhaps with fewer anxieties about heir own finality E.K-R On the Fear of Death Let me not pray to be sheltered from dangers but to be fearless in facing them Let me not beg for the stilling of my pain but for the heart to conquer it Let me not look for allies in life' s battlefield but to my own strength et me not crave in anxious fear to be saved but hope for the patience to win my freedom Grant me that 1 may not be a coward, feeling your mercy in my success alone, but let me find the grasp of your hand in my failure Rabindranath Tagore, Fruit-GatheringWhen I was asked if I would be willing to write a book on death and dying, I enthusiastically accepted the challenge. When I actually sat down and began to wonder what I had got myself into, it became a different matter. Where do I begin? What do I include? How much can I say to strangers who are going to read this book, how much can I share from this experience with dying patients? How many things are communicated nonverbally and have to be felt, experienced, seen, and can hardly be translated into words? I have worked with dying patients for the past two and a half years and this book will tell about the beginning of this experiment, which turned out to be a meaningful and instructive experience for all participants. It is not meant to be a textbook on how to manage dying patients, nor is it intended as a complete study of the psychology of the dying. It is simply an account of a new and challenging opportunity to refocus on the patient as a human being, to include him in dialogues, to learn from him the strengths and weaknesses of our hospital management of the patient. We have asked him to be our teacher so that we may learn more about the final stages of life with all its anxieties, fears, and hopes. I am simply telling the stories of my patients who shared their agonies, their expectations, and their frustrations with us. It is hoped that it will encourage others not to shy away from the "hopelessly" sick but to get closer to them, as they can help them much during their final hours. The few who can do this will also discover that it can be a mutually gratifying experience; they will learn much about the functioning of the human mind, the unique human aspects of our existence, and will emerge from the experience enriched and perhaps with fewer anxieties about their own finality. E. K.-R. ========================= (I) On the Fear of Death Let me not pray to be sheltered from dangers but to be fearless in facing them. Let me not beg for the stilling of my pain but for the heart to conquer it. Let me not look for allies in life's battlefield but to my own strength. Let me not crave in anxious fear to be saved but hope for the patience to win my freedom. Grant me that 1 may not be a coward, feeling your mercy in my success alone; but let me find the grasp of your hand in my failure. Rabindranath Tagore, Fruit-Gathering