it's a god damned lie? What do they have to tell about that for, when they know how it hurts? Damn them. damn them damn them I won't. I'll be quiet. This is nothing to get excited about. Look. Suppose he were someone I didn, t know very well. Suppose he were another girl. Then I d just telephone and say Well, for goodness sake, what happened to you? "Thats what I'd do, and I'd never even think about it. Why can't I be casual and natural, just because I love him? I can be. Honestly, I can be I'll call him up, and be so easy and pleasant. You see if I won't, God Oh, don't let me call him. Don' t, don t, don't God, aren't You really going to let him call me? Are You sure, God? Couldn 't You please relent? Couldn,'t You? I don't even ask You to let him telephone me this minute, God; only let him do it in a little while. I'll count five hundred by fives. I'll do it so slowly and so fairly. If he hasn't telephoned then, I'll call him. I will Oh, please, dear God, dear kind God, my blessed Father in Heaven. let him call before then please God. please Five, ten, fifteen, twenty, twentyfive, thirty, thirty-fiveit's a God damned lie? What do they have to tell about that for, when they know how it hurts? Damn them, damn them, damn them. I won't. I'll be quiet. This is nothing to get excited about. Look. Suppose he were someone I didn't know very well. Suppose he were another girl. Then I d just telephone and say, "Well, for goodness' sake, what happened to you?" That's what I'd do, and I'd never even think about it. Why can't I be casual and natural, just because I love him? I can be. Honestly, I can be. I'll call him up, and be so easy and pleasant. You see if I won't, God. Oh, don't let me call him. Don't, don't, don't. God, aren't You really going to let him call me? Are You sure, God? Couldn't You please relent? Couldn't You? I don't even ask You to let him telephone me this minute, God; only let him do it in a little while. I'll count five hundred by fives. I'll do it so slowly and so fairly. If he hasn't telephoned then, I'll call him. I will. Oh, please, dear God, dear kind God, my blessed Father in Heaven, let him call before then. Please, God. Please. Five, ten, fifteen, twenty, twentyfive, thirty, thirty-five