8.How to Guess Your Age Corey Ford
8. How to Guess Your Age Corey Ford
Contents *About the Author *Text Analysis *Summary *Exercises
Contents About the Author Text Analysis Summary Exercises
About the Author *Corey Ford (1902-1969)was a humorist who wrote more than thirty books and five hundred articles and stories in his long and varied career.His most famous works were his monthly parodies for Vanity Fair and a series of articles "The Making of a Magazine"for the first issues of the New Yorker
About the Author Corey Ford (1902-1969) was a humorist who wrote more than thirty books and five hundred articles and stories in his long and varied career. His most famous works were his monthly parodies for Vanity Fair and a series of articles “The Making of a Magazine” for the first issues of the New Yorker
Text Ageing brings unavoidable changes to one's physical and mental condition.Corey Ford presents in a humorous way these changes as he experienced them.Read on and enjoy the humor
Text Ageing brings unavoidable changes to one’s physical and mental condition. Corey Ford presents in a humorous way these changes as he experienced them. Read on and enjoy the humor
1. It seems to me that they are building staircases steeper than they used to.The risers are higher,or there are more of them, or something.Maybe this is because it is so much farther today from the first to the second floor,but I've noticed it is getting harder to make two steps at a time any more Nowadays it is all I can do to make one step at a time
1. It seems to me that they are building staircases steeper than they used to. The risers are higher, or there are more of them, or something. Maybe this is because it is so much farther today from the first to the second floor, but I’ve noticed it is getting harder to make two steps at a time any more. Nowadays it is all I can do to make one step at a time
2. Another thing I've noticed is the small print they're using lately.Newspapers are getting farther and farther away when I hold them,and I have to squint to make them out.The other day I had to back halfway out of a telephone booth in order to read the number on the coin box.It is obviously ridiculous to suggest that a person my age needs glasses,but the only other way I can find out what's going on is to have somebody read aloud to me,and that's not too satisfactory because people speak in such low voices these days that I can't hear them very well
2. Another thing I’ve noticed is the small print they’re using lately. Newspapers are getting farther and farther away when I hold them, and I have to squint to make them out. The other day I had to back halfway out of a telephone booth in order to read the number on the coin box. It is obviously ridiculous to suggest that a person my age needs glasses, but the only other way I can find out what’s going on is to have somebody read aloud to me, and that’s not too satisfactory because people speak in such low voices these days that I can’t hear them very well
3. Everything is farther than is used to be It's twice the distance from my house to the station now _and they've added a fair-sized hill that I never noticed before.The trains leave sooner too.I've given up running for them,because they start faster these days when I try to catch them.You can't depend on timetables any more,and it's no use asking the conductor.I ask him a dozen times a trip if the next station is where I get off,and he always says it isn't
3. Everything is farther than is used to be. It’s twice the distance from my house to the station now, and they’ve added a fair-sized hill that I never noticed before. The trains leave sooner too. I’ve given up running for them, because they start faster these days when I try to catch them. You can’t depend on timetables any more, and it’s no use asking the conductor. I ask him a dozen times a trip if the next station is where I get off, and he always says it isn’t
How can you trust a conductor like that? Usually I gather up my bundles and put on my hat and coat and stand in the aisle a couple of stops away,just to make sure I don't go past my destination.Sometimes I make doubly sure by getting off at the station ahead
How can you trust a conductor like that? Usually I gather up my bundles and put on my hat and coat and stand in the aisle a couple of stops away, just to make sure I don’t go past my destination. Sometimes I make doubly sure by getting off at the station ahead
A lot of other things are different lately Barbers no longer hold up a mirror behind me when they've finished,so I can see the back of my head,and my wife has been taking care of the tickets lately when we go to the theater.They don't use the same material in clothes any more,either.I've noticed that all my suits have a tendency to shrink,especially in certain places such as around the waist or in the seat of the pants,and the laces they put in shoes nowadays are harder to reach
4. A lot of other things are different lately. Barbers no longer hold up a mirror behind me when they’ve finished, so I can see the back of my head, and my wife has been taking care of the tickets lately when we go to the theater. They don’t use the same material in clothes any more, either. I’ve noticed that all my suits have a tendency to shrink, especially in certain places such as around the waist or in the seat of the pants, and the laces they put in shoes nowadays are harder to reach
5. Revolving doors revolve much faster than they used to.I have to let a couple of openings go past me before I jump in,and by the time I get up nerve enough to jump out again I'm right back in the street where I started.It's the same with golf.I'm giving it up because these modern golf balls they sell are so hard to pick up when I stoop over.I've had to quit driving,too;the restrooms in filling stations are getting farther and farther apart.Usually I just stay home at night and read the papers,particularly the obituary columns.It's funny how much more interesting the obituary columns have been getting lately
5. Revolving doors revolve much faster than they used to. I have to let a couple of openings go past me before I jump in, and by the time I get up nerve enough to jump out again I’m right back in the street where I started. It’s the same with golf. I’m giving it up because these modern golf balls they sell are so hard to pick up when I stoop over. I’ve had to quit driving, too; the restrooms in filling stations are getting farther and farther apart. Usually I just stay home at night and read the papers, particularly the obituary columns. It’s funny how much more interesting the obituary columns have been getting lately
